what type of black girl are you?
just a few thoughts.
Throughout my whole life, that has been the question that has been proposed to me.
Growing up in a predominately white space, I was constantly questioned about my loyalty to my race.
Did I know the songs?
How did I wear my hair?
Did wear Baby Phat versus Lacoste?
At the time, it felt like I lived in a constant state of confusion.
I came from a black family, you couldn’t mistake my dark skin for any other race – why was I being singled out for not being black enough?
I didn’t fit in with the white kids but I got around my own and still found myself plagued with the same resistance.
At a young age, my parents decided to put me in private school where I stayed from preschool to 9th grade - it was all I knew. Yet spending my summers at local camps, I realized quickly that there were other worlds and I didn’t fit into them.
Being a child, I didn’t make my own decisions. I lived under the reign of my parents – so why was I being penalized for decisions that were beyond me?
Let’s run down the statements I’ve been told for fun:
I’ve been told that I didn’t love myself or my people for wearing my hair straight.
I’ve been told that I’m the type of black girl that only white men would date.
I’ve been told that I was trying to act white for wearing cable knit sweaters.
Now at 32, I’m looking back at those experiences wondering why I had to be boxed in.
Why couldn’t I just be me?
As social media expands over various platforms, I am pleased to see different versions of black girls thrive.
From goth girls to preppy girls to theater girls, we, now, have the freedom to choose different paths and aesthetics like a Mortal Kombat character.
                       Choose your hair, choose your niche, choose your weapon.
Being a black woman in America is so complex as a whole so why create internal division by boxing in our personalities?
Allowing our girls to grow in a way that gives them the freedom to be whatever the fuck they want helps them understand that the sky is the limit.
We can be a fashion designer or a neurosurgeon or an engineer or a chef.
We can listen to rock or trade anime cards or participate in activities that are usually out of our cultural realm.
As a black woman, I will continue to fight and advocate for the continuous expansion of other black girls. Why?
So they never have to answer the question of what type of black girl are you?
another good piece, friend!
I lived in an all black neighborhood until I was like 7 before moving to a place that was mostly white. This was a key moment in my life and I realized quickly how easy it was to throw me into a certain type of box based on things I had no control over as a child, like where I lived. I'm glad there's more space now to be any type of Black girl I want to be. However, people love to say Black women aren't a monolith, while also being mad that we choose to be different and our own unique selves
Same! I went to predominantly white schools but a black church. I didn’t fit in at either place. For all of social media’s faults, it has opened up a whole new world of letting black girls just be.