where's our mockingjay?

someone call katniss asap.

As an American, I feel like we are all the orchestra playing on the Titanic as it's sinking.

Like actually what the fuck is going on?

This election has drained the life out of me and we still have over a week left. Ballot boxes are being burned, celebrities are revealing their sides to help sway votes, racists rallies are being held in mass. It all feels like a really bad dream that no one can wake up from.

We're debating over candidates when there should be no conversation.

In the midst of it all, we are funding a genocide that continues to be put on the back burner like a chore you don't want to deal with.

It's very hard to be patriotic right now, it's very hard to be American.

Personally, I never felt like it was the land of the free.

In a recent bout of period depression, I decided to watch all of the Hunger Games - don’t ask me why but it felt comforting.

By the time, I got to Mockingjay Part 1 and 2 - I started to realize that the comfort came from the fact that America is Panem’s step-sibiling. Our 12 districts might not be as defined as the movie but the contrast between cities like Calabasas, California and Flint, Michigan are very clear.

President Snow felt like someone Trump would invite to Mar-A-Lago and despite other’s feelings on Kamala, she gave the air of President Coin trying to change tomorrow for a better future.

If you’ve watched all of these movies, you know the outcome and I can’t help but wonder what America will look like post-election.

Looking at the history of the United States, I’m not surprised at where we are versus how we started out. The foundation of our country was built on deception and racism and without making and maintaining integral changes within every aspect - it makes sense that we are still in a very similar place and mindset of our founding fathers.

A wise woman once said:

I think the apple's rotten right to the core
From all the things passed down
From all the apples coming before
I split the apple down symmetrical lines
And what I find is kinda scary
Makes me just wanna drive

Granted Charlie XCX was using this in a completely different context but it applies to the American government as a whole.

I think I can speak for many of us when I say that we are scared - scratch that - terrified.

As an anxiety girlie, I’ve always had a little conspiracy theorist in me because as a minority and as a woman, I have seen and been shown on multiple occasions that our thoughts, feelings, and bodies don’t matter to those in power.

So as I sit here waiting anxiously, I’m wondering where is our Katniss Everdean?

This would be a great time for a Mockingjay to unite us all.

I would volunteer as tribute but I don’t love group activities or people in general so I probably shouldn’t be the face of a country-wide revolt but happy to help source someone who could be. I’m great at vetting people as long as it’s not romantically.

All jokes aside - I don’t know what to say or feel or think anymore when it comes to the state of America.

It just reminds me of that one toxic person that keeps on making the same mistakes knowingly expecting different outcomes - you just got to let them learn on their own.

The only problem in this situation is that usually the lives of millions are the collateral damage of said mistakes.